Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
