And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
It's just like the Real World with babies
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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