i don't like sucking hair
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize