he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize