Sponge bath it is.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
