no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
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I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
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Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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