In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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