Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize