ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Randomize
