Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
