I hate all girls vehemently.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
