I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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