Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
