...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
