Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize