WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
