i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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