...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
