Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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