Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize