I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
