Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
