She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize