So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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