Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize