R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
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