Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
