They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
