We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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