super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize