I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
