I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize
