I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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