All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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