At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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