last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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