How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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