it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Hippo gnu deer
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
