Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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