I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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