worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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