My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize