Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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