I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
