Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize