Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
