i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
