Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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