I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
i came on her dog
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
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