He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
