i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
