I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
